Holden Gets A Pony

Okay, so what's with all the references to Holden getting a pony when Bush's numbers fall?  The lovely and talented Athenae of First Draft described the origins thusly:

Way back in the dark days of March (or maybe April?) 2004, Holden bet me $50 that Bush would drop below 40 percent approval rating by the 4th of July. Since Holden was clearly a crude and fuckwitted peddler of nonsense, I agreed to his silly wager.

Over the next months, we proceeded to taunt one another, until finally Holden insulted my womanhood or something, so I was forced to reveal that he is, in fact, a girl who wears a frilly dress.

Thus began the great Eschaton Civil War. There were teams. The teams had uniforms. Mine were better. Holden’s had more lace.

But there’s only so much clothing online, and so we ran out of ugly bridesmaids dresses to clothe one another in, and thus it was revealed that Holden, in addition to being a frilly girl, also rode a pony.

Somehow (there was a lot of liquor involved) this bet evolved into Bush’s sucky poll numbers resulting in Holden ACQUIRING a pony, rather than just riding one, and now they are irrevocably linked: Bush sucks, Holden gets a pony.

Scott Baio is in there too, and Thersites getting into a fight with him, and there's something about Hecate and some box turtles and last we saw NTodd he was running off to secure the 75 kilos of smack in his hatchback, but we got most of the stains out of the carpet. You should have been there, man. It was epic. I think Tena's still hungover, and pie never did find her socks.

And thus many other Atriots have been jealous of Holden ever since.

See also:

• First Draft: Pony, Bitches
• The Poor Man: Experts Warn of “Peak Pony”

Thanks to QuinnLaBelle for tracking down Athenae's text.

[New: Holden's Theme.]